The secret service isn't allowed to yell "Get down!" anymore when the president is about to be attacked. Now they have to yell "Donald, duck!"
politics jokes
2,089 total · showing the first 120 · page 1 of 5
We should hold a reddit-wide vote on whether or not to bring back the upvote/downvote counter. But how will we count the votes?
How did George W Bush use reggae to win his election? He needed an Al Gore riddim.
Why isn't the Vice President running for the Democratic Nomination this year? He's Biden his time.
Big vote today in England. If Leave wins I predict : Brexit to be followed by Grexit. Departugal. Italeave. Fruckoff. Czechout. Oustria. Finish. Slovakout. Latervia. Byegium
Everybody, it's OK to vote for Hillary Clinton The snuke in her sniz was successfully deactivated.
A Pervert, A Con Artist and a Fascist walk into a bar... ..The Bartender Says, "What'll it be Mr. President Trump?"
What kind of cancer always stands by the government? Pro-state cancer.
Why do presidents have unsatisfied wives? It takes four years to get an election.
Is your refrigerator running? Because I might vote for it.
im leavin the united states now that trump is president i am packing my bags and moving to alaska i don't wanna live in this country anymore
What is President Clinton's favourite game? Swallow the leader.
Government Shutdown: Day 13 Anthony Weiner decides to help. He takes a photo. He tweets. Congress now sees where balls are located.
What is the difference between a guitar player and government bonds? Government bonds mature over time and earn money
Obama proved a black man can even be president.. And that no matter how high up a black man gets he can't get out of government housing!
Cosby/Fogle for President! Americans can forget the last 8 years happened and feel like kids again.
What will be the campaign motto of Trump's opponent in 2020? Make America Great Again
The National Shredded Cheese Council just endorsed Donald Trump for president... They're ready to make America grate again.
What is the opposite of progress? Congress
What is a government mandate? When Obama and Biden go out to dinner together.
What's President Obama's favorite vegetable? Barack-oli
How do you know when a joke has gone too far? It's elected President.
After the election, everyone wonders why people voted for Trump. The French know the answer 'Ils se sont trumpe' (I was wrong = je me suis trompe)
President George W. Bush was once informed that 4 Brazilian soldiers were killed in Iraq. He responded, "How many is a brazilian?"