barber jokes

What does a barber yell when he plays hide-and-go-seek? Ready or not, hair I comb!

What did the koala bear say to the barber? You ca-lip this?

My neighborhood barber just got arrested for selling drugs.. I've been his customer for 6 years. I had no idea he was a barber.

A few weeks ago my barber cut my hair too short. I didn't like how it looked at all, but now it's growing on me.

My neighborhood barber just got arrested for selling drugs... I've been his customer for 6 years. I had no idea he was a barber!

[OC] What did the disgruntled barber give to the prince? A bad heir day.

What do you call someone who has to shave 30 times a day? A barber

Why was everybody too afraid to go to the barber? He committed barbercide.

Barber: What would you like today? Me: Make me look attractive. Barber: CAROL! CANCEL ALL MY APPOINTMENTS!

BARBER: would you like a hot towel? ME: buddy, I don't objectify towels

[Barber gets out a small mirror to show an owl the back of its head] Owl: No I got it *rotates* Owl: Wait where'd it- *rotates* Owl: Ok help

Barber: And how old are you little man? Fred: Eight. Barber: And do you want a haircut? Fred: Well I certainly didn't come in for a shave!

What do you call a high-priced barber shop? A clip joint.

What do you call a female barber? A Bobbitt

confession: when my barber spins me around and hands me a mirror to check the back I just fake it. Who is even that coordinated?

A man sitting in a barber's chair noticed that the barber's hands were very dirty. When he commented on this the barber explained "Yes sir no one's been in for a shampoo yet."

I got my haircut the other day... ...and I just saw my barber at the grocery. He asked how I liked my haircut. I told him I didn't like it at first, but its growing on me.

What haircut did the Texan barber recommend when asked? He couldn't think of anything, and said "I'll mullet over"

"Hello, cops? A man in an apron attacked my hair with scissors!" "LOL sir, that was a barber." "He was black." "We're sending a battleship."

Q: Why did the barber win the race? A: He knew a short cut.

My neighbourhood barber just got arrested for selling drugs I've been his customer for 6 years. I had no idea he was a barber.

[barber shop] BARBER: what can we do for you today? MEDUSA: well.. [removes hat] BARBER: MEDUSA: BARBER: so do you want more or less snakes?

A Vietnamese person gets a haircut A Vietnamese person walks into a Barbershop and sits down. The barber asks "What' chu want fam?" The Vietnamese person replies, "How do you know my name?"

Q: Who can shave 25 times a day and still have a beard? A: A barber.