dating jokes

"I just came across my wife’s Tinder profile and I’m so angry about her lies. She is not “fun to be around.”"

here's my dating advice. Take your date to go-karts. everyone loves go-karts. I just solved your life. you're welcome

When Magnesium and Oxygen started dating I was like, "O MG!"

Q: Why do you when you sign to a Dating site ? A: More bang for your buck !!!! (Wow, that was bad)

If I've learned anything from online dating sites it's that all the single women are on top of mountains.

What's the best part about dating a Muslim The sex is explosive

You know what West Virginians say about dating, don't you? The closer the kin, the better the skin.

All women want to be swept off their feet, until you push them into the sea. Dating is hard!

Netflix would be by far the best dating site. "Here are 9 other singles in your area who have also watched Pokemon for 12 straight hrs"

Be wary about dating a female that pronounces the letter H silent Especially when she tells you that all she wants is happiness.

What's the difference between fishing and dating? In one you don't want to jerk the hook, but in the other you don't want to hook the jerk.

[First date] okay just dont let her know you're a trump supporter Her: so what kinda wine should I get Me: haha white is always the best

Dating a redneck The only thing worse than the friend zone is the family zone. But when a redneck says she loves you like a brother, its go time.

Dating Q. Why did this OkCupid user never go out on a date? A. "I couldn't imagine a date could be interested in knowing about me more than this website"

Pedophiles are every boy's role model when it comes to dating Because they know how to pick up little girls

speed dating I'm looking for a girl with fire in her eyes. Her: Hi. My name is Carrie.

Tinder isn't a babysitting app. Apologies to Crystal and Janine for the misunderstanding.

I've just started an online dating site for Siamese twins. It's called Connect 4.

What is the difference between a single 40-year-old woman and a single 40-year-old man? The 40-year-old woman thinks often of having children and the man thinks often about dating them.

Whats the best part about dating a Black girl? You don't have to worry about meeting her Father

What's the worst single thing you could do to someone? Start dating them

Tinder - Indian Edition Heard about the Indian edition of the Tinder dating app? No matter how many times you swipe, it keeps showing the same (arranged) partner.

I'm currently dating a woman that, like me, has Parkinson's and kleptomania. We're going to take things slow.

Hey Young Girls, when a first date suggests you two go to "your place", take him to Target.