Why was the Robot angry at the engineer? Because he screwed his wife!
engineer jokes
134 total · showing the first 120 · page 1 of 5
Even if I end up being a civil engineer I won't build tunnels. Because it's boring.
Optimist- The glass is half full Pessimist- The glass is half empty Engineer- The glass is twice the size it needs to be. College Student- I can't afford the glass.
Did you hear about the blind engineer ? Who built the taj mahal
What does as electronic engineer make for breakfast? Ohmlettes
What did the network engineer give to his fiancee? A token ring.
My friend decided to become an astrophysicist instead of an engineer. I guess you could say he got sucked into black holes.
A Pentium processor engineer is counting visitors to a bar He's counted 12.000000000057249999 patrons so far.
Heading to work this morning there was a car parked on the train tracks, with a bumper sticker that said "Honk if you love Jesus!" That train engineer must have REALLY loved Jesus.
I'm a Chemical Engineer and I have some good Chemistry jokes. ... but I never get a good reaction.
What do you call an engineer who looks at other people's shoes when walking? Extroverted
A mechanical engineer asks to his crush... Do have a manhole I could enter?
An unemployed engineer opens a clinic... He soon goes out of business, since the field is over saturated due to all the unemployed engineers opening clinics recently.
The future is now An electrical engineer invented a new kind of transistor that uses tapioca instead of silicon. He called it the boba FET.
If you want to be a General Motors engineer, your memory needs to be perfect. You have to recall everything.
Why didn't the engineer cross his own bridge? Because he didn't truss it.
How do you pick out the extroverted engineer? He's the one staring at YOUR feet when he talks
What if earth rotates 30 times faster? Interviewer:"If the Earth rotates 30 times faster, what will happen?" engineer:"We will get our salary everyday" :D Think Greedily Act Confidently
A QA Engineer walks into a bar an orders a beer. And orders 2 beers, and orders 7445553822 beers, and orders -1 beers, and orders asdfadf beers, and orders Robert'); DROP TABLE beers;
A British engineer just started his own business in Afghanistan He's making land mines that look like prayer mats. It's doing well. He says prophets are going through the roof.
What time does an engineer set his alarm clock for? Around Thevenin the morning
An engineer gets banned from r/fitness He was trying to sell SCRs to their NOx users...
Invention a German engineer has just invented a land mine that looks like a prayer mat. You should invest in this because prophets are going through the roof!
What is the difference between a mechanical and civil engineer? The former builds weapons, the latter targets