salesperson jokes

"Ha-ha who me? Oh, I put ketchup on everything!" CAR SALESMAN: please stop putting ketchup on these Buicks.

What did the salesman at footlocker say to the customer? Shoes wisely

Salesman: Would you like to buy a pocket calculator? Customer: No thanks. I know how many pockets I have.

CARPET SALESMAN: [sighing, handing me another sample] What about this one for your bedroom? ME: Hmmm no that one is also far too small

[test driving car with car salesman] *parks on make out hill*

I said to the shoe salesman - I'd like to return these shoes... They've got holes in them! Shoe Salesman - Hmmmm yes, that certainly seems to be the Crocs of the matter.

Her: What do you do? Me: Global prosthetics distribution. Her: You're an artificial limb salesman? Me: I prefer international arms dealer'.

A salesman rings the doorbell...

Whenever I test drive a car and the Salesman decides to come along, I lock the doors lock eyes and say "We ride together, we Die together."

The happiest person I know is a lubricant salesperson... I guess you could say they don't have a lot of friction in their life.

Mirror salesman... Now there is a job I could see myself doing.

The best salesperson ever was the first woman to shave off her eyebrows and draw them back on, then convince a second woman to do it.

I hate it when the used car salesman is just a car wearing a suit.

This LSD may be taking a turn, but I think this pony rabbit is a piece of shit insurance salesman.

What do you have to know to be a real estate salesman? Lots.

What does a hardware salesman do on a one night stand? He nuts and bolts.

What does a carpet salesman give his wife for Valentine's Day? Rugs and kisses!

I had to pay for a satellite dish But the salesman said it was on the house.

Why do buddhist make bad vacuum salesman? They can't deal with attachments.

"No no no!" said the enraged businessman to the persistent salesman. "I cannot see you today!" "That's fine" said the salesman "I'm selling spectacles."

What do you call a bald spot on a cell phone salesperson? A gap in coverage.

I used to work as a bed salesman One day this guy came in and started climbing into the beds and asking really specific questions. Then it hit me, he was an undercover cop.

me: "4,000 for a beehive?" salesman: "sir, there are 8,000 bees in there, that's only 50p each" me: [checking my wallet] "give me 3 bees"

Who's the most badass flower salesman? Chuck Florist