Why did the pervert cross the road? Because he had his dick stuck in a chicken
edgy jokes
21,996 total · showing the first 120 · page 3 of 5
What's the difference between a lawyer and a prostitute? One you pay $500 an hour to screw you. The other one has sex for money.
You know how horny the Romans were back then? For fuck's sake, they even nailed Jesus!
My ex husbands Voicemail was a trick one where he'd say "Hello Hello, so you think he'd answered and that's why he's dead.
One day my kids will find a "We're Closed" sign for a grocery store & ask what it is & I'll sound like the old guy explaining shit in Zelda.
A child was recently forced to write on the chalk board until he died He was sentenced to death
Why are gametes so popular? Because sex cells!
My penis is jealous because... baby, you just blew my mind
How do you reuse a condom? Turn it inside out and shake the shit out of it!
some say bill gates named his company after his penis. but Steve jobs named his company after the size of his tumor
What porn do Saudis get away with? Camel toes.
I am never more aware that I don't have boobs than when I'm paying for my own drink.
How did the frog die? He kermits suicide. I'll show myself out now.
Not all Latvian so unfortunate Lucky man is farmed 3 potato. Soon man has hit by lightning and die. Is true some have all luck, struggle finally over.
Damn girl, are you reddit? Cus you repeat the same stupid shit over and over
For sale: The entire Internet on 33,674,964,367 DVDs. Or without porn, on 54 DVDs.
My sex life That is all
Afghan shaking a carpet I was walking down the road when I saw an Afghan bloke standing on a fifth floor balcony shaking a carpet. I shouted up to him, "What's up Abdul, won't it fucking start?"
*smudges lipstick* *smears eyeliner* *gets mascara on earlobe* *never tries make-up sex again*
Yes... I retweet. Isn't that kinda the point? Spread the love and shit? Mostly shit... But that's your fault...
Did you know that by today's standards Marilyn Monroe would be considered dead?
[NSFW]- What is David Bowie's zodiac sign? Cancer.
What's the difference between a Lamborghini and dead babies? I didn't lose my virginity in the back of a Lamborghini.
A fun thing to do would be to eat rat poison during a dinner party & then, when you die, they'll blame the host's cooking. Lol.